Is this press release good?
For college homework he write report press release. press release imaginary coffee shop tt relocating West city centre. attach it, cd read tell it’s bad?
Thanks time.
PRESS RELEASE
Posh Coffee Shop Set Relocation Immediate Release
An upmarket West coffee shop relocating St. Enoch Centre. Peter’s Posh
Premises situated Byres Road 30 ys increasing client base,
it requiring larger premises.
Senior staff considered relocating Buchanan Galleries Princes Square. However,
decided St. Enoch Centre ideal pe se renovated.
Yesterday, Peter Gay, manage Peter’s Posh Premises, said: “ delight able
to relocate St. Enoch Centre. hoping customers jt fm West
End, Glasgow.”
Many regular customers he shown excitement proposal. Crystal McPherson
declared: “ coffee shop week, ss wait ages
to seat. me larger premises great, wl he chance
shopping St. Enoch Centre surrounding areas.”
A spokesman St. Enoch Centre announced: “ chance
neighbouring shops business, expecting increase takings.”
The Peter’s Posh Premises expected on November.
31st October 2008
ENDS
For information contact
Lewis Barclay
Press Officer
Glasgow Guardian
Glasgow
Tel: 0141 200 3000
I te blank spaces middle sentences, that’s happened copied pasted it. don’t upload it.
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November 7th, 2009 at 10:40 am
I think the opening paragraph needs a bit more punch. That’s what will attract the journalist that see it, and remember journalists get hundreds of such press releases every day so yours needs to stand out. Perhaps you can link the move to the current economic crisis, and the fact the coffee shop is increasing business in tough times? A local angle to a global story is always good,
You should also include an ‘About Us’ paragraph at the end of the release. This should give basic information about the business, when it opened, awards won, number of staff employed, etc. Ideally this should be no more than 100 words and should include website references if available.
Finally, you might want to check out this neat website. It’s at http://www.pressreleasegrader.com. It will evaluate your press release for free and give tips about how it can be improved.
Good luck.